I’ve been writing to you kind folks for a few months and although I’ve shared about our lives, I don’t think I ever took the time to properly introduce myself and my little clan. I never really know how to describe people or what people really want to know, so I’ll just share a load of random, unrelated and probably uninteresting facts which I think is much more telling than any stinking résumé.
We’ll start with E. She’s 3 years old and on any given day can be found wandering the house demanding that everyone walk the plank or begging, pleading that I turn on My Big Big Friend. She has amazing hair and is obsessed with bugs. E has a bizarre quirk similar to Brick on “The Middle” and always, always repeats back the last word spoken to her.
Me: Tell Daddy what we did today.
Me: Did we go to the park?
E: The park.
Me: Mommy is your favorite, right?
Next up is B. B – also known as Bebe, Chunk, Drama Baby and Bear – is almost 16 months old and likes to pretend she’s 10 months old again and helpless. She gets all, “I’m sorry, I’m pretending I don’t know how to walk today. But thanks for the $50 shoes.” Or “Yea, it’s 104° and I’m flushed and overheated but I’m also part of a sippy cup union and I’ve held that thing up to my parched lips for far too long today. So if you want me to drink, you’re going to have to hold it for me. You understand.” She also has amazing Donald Trump hair and her first word was “snack.” She requires no sleep.
My husband. The Hub.
Side note, The Hub is also the name of a huge general purpose and administration building/campus center at Penn State and it sometimes feels weird referring to my husband as place I napped between classes. So, I’ll start referring to him as “J” more often.
The Hub/J-man is pretty stinking smart. Like, annoyingly smart. My family will call me looking for an answer to a mystery question but then ask to talk to J because surely he knows better than I do, even if the question is related to depilatories or breastfeeding (both clearly within the realm of his expertise). He’s that smart. His hair grows straight of his head and he is an awesome cook (probably unrelated). He would like me to note that this is an unauthorized biography.
Our shared love of documentaries, disinterest in sports, and general distrust of The Man have kept us together all these years. Plus, he puts up with my shenanigans.
Ah, lastly, me. Liz. Have I ever properly introduced myself? I don’t think so. Hi. My name is Liz. I’m 27. Or 28? I can never remember. I’m quite tall but never played basketball or volleyball. I’ve never won anything but the closest I came was runner-up for the 2002 Lawrence County Fair Queen. The title was thieved from me, I tell you. My degree and career was in public relations which I am obviously putting to good use. I spent most of my early 20s trying to become important by society’s standards before fully realizing this life and this world are not what it’s all about. I am a horrible housekeeper and love to cook, which is a terrible combination. I grew up on a farm and yet our garden yields only mint and jalapeños. I have an amazing sense of direction and can remember really minute, unimportant details about people I’ve met only briefly. It makes them really uncomfortable when I can remember their child’s middle name and yet they can’t even remember meeting me.
There you have it. What a terrifying little glance into our lives.
I showed you ours, so show me yours – say “hello” and tell me something random about yourself!