I’ve talked a lot about the chaos and stress of this past year. Tired of hearing about it? Me too. I’m tired of talking about it. I’m tired of thinking about it. Honestly, I’m tired of healing. It’s exhausting. But I am healing.
I had an appointment with an incredible naturopathic doctor yesterday and we went through my entire medical history. Among other things, we discussed my distrust in my body and myself and the way this manifests in my body. It was enlightening and inspiring.
As I’ve mentioned, my hair has been falling out. After yesterday’s appointment, I’m confident that stress and those wretched little pills known as birth control are the cause for the shedding. I had been working on my stress levels and healing and it was devastating to see my hair continue to shed in clumps, despite my best efforts to stop it. I loathed washing and combing my hair and seeing the fistfuls of hair swirling down the drain. Holding those mounds of hair was a tangible representation of the stress and heartache – literal and figuratively- that this year has brought.
A shift in perspective is all we need.
Shedding. It’s actually a beautiful thing. Discarding the unnecessary, the dead, so you can devote energy toward the new, the healthy. Pruning a vine. You can hold on to the past so tightly and devote all your time and energy toward trying to pretty it up that you miss the beauty in the present. The past will never be a comparable and worthy substitute for the present. I decided that instead of focusing on the volume of hair I was losing, I was going to consider the shedding a cleansing and embrace it. Instead of rehashing the astonishingly crappy circumstances of the past year, I am going to focus on the simple blessings of the present.
Like a badass haircut.